So you already know that my water had broken at 33 weeks 4 days and that the doctors were able to stop my labor successfully and they were getting ready to induce me. So we will start there....
I got to eat breakfast that morning...and even though it was hospital food, it tasted so good. I ate every bit of food...hell I had thought about sending BJ to McD's to get me more! I knew it would be my last meal for awhile. I went with my better judgement and refrained from the McD's...my belly really was full and I had the thought that I may get sick during labor and that would not be good.
So finally it was time to move from antepartum to L&D. I walked there...which was a big deal since the only walking I was allowed at that point was from my bed to my bathroom. We got settled in and hooked up to the monitors. The doctor came in and we talked about the game plan. He was going to start the pitocin out small and go up every 30 minutes. This freaked me out but I put my trust in the doctors that they know how this med works and if it was too much they would hold the pitocin at that level or back it down a little. I kept saying to anyone who would listen that I intended to go med-free and that it was important to me. One of the nurses actually laughed and said "hardly anyone in this hospital goes natural...pretty much all of our patients get an epidural." I have to admit...this pissed me off a little and when everyone left I told BJ that I was serious about not having an epidural and that he needed to be strong for me and talk me through the rough part once we got there. Mind you...he did not make it to our first lamaze class and of course has never been present for a birth...he had no clue about what was about to happen. lol.
At around 12:00pm, they started the pitocin. Within about 45 minutes, I started having regular contractions...nothing awful, I was able to talk through them and sent BJ to get some lunch for himself. I was hungry. For the record...he brought back to the room a soda and a bag of M&M's and a package of Reese's PB Cups. I gave him a hard time and told him he was mean. I so wanted those PB Cups! So I spent the afternoon watching TV...all the baby shows on TLC!...and the contractions kept getting more intense as the hours passed but still nothing that I couldn't handle.
The doctor came in around 4 pm and checked me. I was 3 cm and that ticked me off! 4 freaking hours of pitocin and I had not changed a bit! Ugh! So they kept upping my pitocin...and my wonderful husband took a nap! Yes that's right...while I was dealing with contractions and getting ready to give birth to his first child...he took a nap. Complete with snoring! I was so mad but I knew he had not been sleeping well in the hospital with me. The bed that was provided is not exactly comfortable...hell the actual patient beds are not really comfy. You would think they would have the most comfortable beds ever so that the patients could get a good night's sleep but nope.
So anywho...the contractions definitely picked up and I was no longer able to talk through them. I called the nurse and asked for an exercise ball...she found me one. It was the best decision that I had made all day! I used the ball for a good 2 hours straight...I would sway back and forth during contractions and then resting in between. The nurse brought a popcicle...it was the best damn popcicle ever. And I mean ever. But what I really wanted was a cheeseburger. Damn it I was hungry!
Around 7:00pm, I was starting to get really uncomfortable so I kept changing positions...ball, standing, lying in the bed. Rinse and repeat.
At 8:15pm I had the nurse check me again. It had been 4 hours since my last check...which they were not doing a whole lot since my membranes had been ruptured since Tuesday morning. We were trying avoid infections as much as possible. I remembered what the lamaze instructor had said during the one and only class I attended and all the books I had read...I should progress at 1 cm per hour. I expected to be at least 7 cm by now...I was for sure in labor and things were getting intense. In fact at around 7 pm...BJ had asked me if this had all been normal when I would have gone to the hospital. I told me at that point I would have said let's go.
So back to my cervical check...the nurse checked me and I was at 4 cm. Yep...that's right 4 fucking centimeters! I was so angry at my body. It could not do anything right at that point. How could I be having this much pain and be at 4 cm. My attitude at that point was fuck my life. I got through a few more contractions and told BJ that I was done. I could not do this anymore. I was giving up. He asked me at one point what he could do for me. I told him to stop the pitocin, take out my IV and let's go home. I was not ready and it was too early for her to come. He told me he could not do that. I did not like him very much at that point.
Around 8:40pm I asked the nurse what my pain relief options were at that point. She said epidural (of course) or IV meds. After some discussion I decided to do some staidol. Around 8:45pm she administered the med and it definitely did it's job...I was able to sleep/relax/rest between contractions but still had to go through the actual contractions. BJ said I would pass out inbetween and then during each contraction I would wake up and say it hurt. During one contraction (one of the last before she was born) I told him I was for sure done and wanted the epidural. He told me I could do this and just breathe....and I said nope, no more. Around 9:00pm I had made my mind up...I was done with this whole labor thing and I wanted to be out of pain. I wanted the epidural. The nurse left the room to call the nurse anesthestist.
At exactly 9:04pm, I started another contraction...this time I woke up and told BJ that I needed to pee. Throughout the whold labor process I had been able to use the bathroom whenever I needed to so this was a valid request. But I followed that statement up very quickly that I needed to push. BJ freaked. He hit the nurse call button and told her that I was saying I needed to push. She came running in the check me. I was complete (10 cm dialated) and the baby's head was at +2 station...basically just about to come out. She had BJ hit the call button (as her hands were busy holding the baby's head inside me) and got the rest of the doctors in there.
They also paged the NICU team (and as I was told by the NICU nurse a few days later) and told them to come up but they could walk. About 30 seconds later they paged again and said run!
The doctor gave me the okay to push. Two pushes and she was out! Madison Claire was born at 9:09pm...healthy and crying. That was music to our ears since she was 6 weeks early and meant(at least initially) that her lungs were mature and she would not need a whole lot of respiratory assistance. The NICU team did an initial assessment...her Apgar's were 9, 9....can't get much better than that! With in a few minutes they had wrapped her up and quickly gave me a peek at her and then whisked her up to the NICU. BJ went with her...he looked very torn though. I knew he wanted to be there with me but also wanted to go to the NICU with her. I told him to go with her.She is here!
It then took 30-45 minutes to get the placenta delivered. That was so much rougher than giving birth to Maddie. The doctor had to literally put her hand up there and scrap it from the side of my uterus. Apparently it had not received the message that this pregnancy was over! But it did come out and it was intact. They also assesed me and there were no tears! Yay! I got up as soon as they would let me and used the bathroom. A little over an hour after I had her...they moved me back to antepartum. I actually walked on my own! I think I was trying to prove that I was totally okay so that I could go down to the NICU and see my beautiful daughter.
I sent my husband out to McD's for food...they had offered me a dinner but honestly it did not look good to me. I wanted a cheeseburger...and fries. So I ate as quickly as possible and we headed down to the NICU so I sould see my daughter.
She was amazing and the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. BJ had to force me to leave after an hour so that I could get some rest. I could have sat in the rocking chair all night with her. It was instant love and I could no longer imagine my life without her in it. So with out further ado...here is my most precious gift.